Transitional goodbyes.

I feel like I really want to say something poignant, something that makes sense of this random need to do what I'm about to do. Of course, nothing poignant or clarifying comes to mind. The only words that are lingering in my head are..."I feel like it's time to go."

I created this blog in February of 2008 in the midst of the Obama/Clinton democratic nomination war. I had so many feelings, thoughts and emotions swirling around in my head about what was happening during that election cycle so I figured I would start a blog and have a platform to let it all out. Once the election came and went and Obama officially snagged the nomination AND subsequently won [GOBAMA :) ] I didn't have much else to say about politics anymore. This blog turned into an "all about me" spot & the things that entertained me. Favorite tv shows, outings, vacays, private thoughts. This blog contains so much of my life between 2008-2010. It was my first one. A girl can only have one first :) But as with what happens to most firsts....it's time to walk away and let it rest. I don't blog here at all any more. Maybe once in a blue moon, if that. But that's not my reason for retiring Remarkably Chanel. I don't want to make any excuses for it. I just feel like it's right. My life is so different now from what it was four years ago. I'm so different. I would like to start my blogging journey from where I am now and see where it takes me.

To my forty something followers, thank you for any of your time and comments that you shared with me. To have any followers at all who were interested in what I ever had to say is humbling and rewarding and I thank you so so much. I'll post the link to my new digs one I move in and get comfy.


I'll leave with the sounds of someone I just lost way too soon and still haven't fully coped because her voice meant everything and then some to me. Ms Whitney Elizabeth Houston. RIP, beautiful.

Dear 2011:

Let me start by saying that you are sneaky, slick, fast, and conniving as hell . I swear, you just got here!!! It was just January three weeks ago. smh. It's like I blinked, and it was Thanksgiving. This has been one of the fastest years of my life in a long time and i'm not quite sure how I feel about it. It's like i've been in a coma for twelve months and somehow I slept through an entire year! Only...i didnt sleep much this yr at all. lol. Seriously though...I feel like I can joke and play with you, 2011, because you were so much more kinder and gentler to me than your evil ass sister, 2010. That bitch...

So how do I run this year down? Just because I like to do things like this, I'll come up with 3 words to describe 2011:

Tangible
Scary
Transformational

Yeah. Those are three good ones. 2011 brought more clarity to me than i've felt in a long while and that automatically made it better than the couple of years before it. Of course, along with seeing things more clearly, comes fear. You can't be afraid of that which you can't see or feel. But once you can see things clearly for what they truly are...fear can settle in because then you have certain responsibilities on your shoulders: decision-making, self-accountability, damage control, etc. Shit is scary. But it's real. And it's necessary. Without blunt, raw, genuine honesty and the ability to SEE clearly...there's no room for change and growth. Without change and growth, you remain stuck in whatever has enough power to hold you back. 2011 taught me well. This year I have opened to the necessity of change in ways I can't and wont explain here, but i feel in my heart and soul will lead to further transformation in one form or another. And for that, I am thankful. I cried a lot over these 12 months. The difference between the bulk of my tears this year, and ALL of them last year is that most of the tears that fell in 2011 were cleansing, therapeutic and a way for my soul to express that I was "getting what needed to be got". My heart is in a slightly better place because this year has shown ME how to be a little bit better to it. *smile*...thank you.

Oh and I also kinda sorta finally GRADUATED from undergrad this year!!!!!!!!!! :) Automatically makes 2011 go hard.

2012, I have high hopes for you and you have large shoes to fill. I'm not worried though because there's so much more work to be done and so many ways for you to show up and show out for me. I'm so ready.

Too soon for my End of the Yr post

BUT I will go ahead and say that this process i'm going through has been a long and tedious one. I have learned a lot. Still learning every single day. Still shedding a lot of mental and emotional weight. Trying to stop picking up garbage along the way. Nmh. Still going on. And i'm better today than who I was this time a year ago so i am blessed.

End of the year wrap up coming in about 10-12 day! :)

Grad school update

First semester almost OVER!!! :) And i'm loving it. Writing a lot of good poetry that i'm feeling somekinda way about. I think my craft is finally pulling itself together and becoming what I really want it to be. Which means....PUBLISHING! I really need to get some stuff out there. If i can get about 80 pages of solid, cohesive work, i'll start querying publishers andd see if i can make it do what it do. So excited about this ;)