Friday, November 14, 2008

I told you it was coming (Prop 8 rant of all rants)

Allow me to graciously begin by yelling a big FUCK YOU VERY MUCH California. You have boldly told me that the unwavering love that I have for my girlfriend (partner,significant other, love of my life, whatever u want to respectfully call her) means jack shit to you. It doesn't matter that we've been together for almost four years. If I were a straight chick and wasn't married by now after four years of a relatinship, i'd be shitting bricks on somebody's forhead, stressed out from all of the straight magazines bombarding me with "101 Tips on How to Trick Him Into Marrying You and Living Happily Ever After!" But i'm not straight. I'm very gay. And California doesn't seem to mind stripping me of my personal rights as a working tax payer. California was quick to pimp slap the entire LGBT community on November 4th and made sure that we know MARRIAGE IS A SACRED BOND BETWEEN MAN AND WOMAN and us homo's should keep our scandalous ilk confined to dungeons and back alleys where all the pedophiles and AIDS infested condoms lurk. Because that's what we do right? We all molest children and have unprotected monkey sex until we pass out in drug induced comas. Yep. Us gay folk. We need much prayer. Much MUCH prayer from the likes of all the heteros who voted Yes on Prop 8. Because Lord knows that you all are perfect. With your white picket fence houses, elitist health care policies, fully stocked HGTV kitchens, Leave it To Beaver marriages and adorable 2.5 kids. All of you supporters of Prop 8 have never even been within five feet of say...DIVORCE. gasp! PRE-MARITAL SEX. shut your mouth! Alcohol/drug abuse. Potty mouth. Eating pork. Smoking cigarettes. Getting tattoos. Lusting after the new secretary in the office upstairs with the long hair and fake tits. Shacking up with the boyfriend or girlfriend for those years of unwedded bliss filled with hot arguments and porn-style sex. Telling that one little white lie to save your ass from getting fired/beat up/knocked out or dragged away. Nope. All prop 8 supporters live in non-glass houses and can cast as many stones as they'd like at us disgusting homo-heathens.

Give me a fucking break and then blow it out of your tight hipocritical asses. I am so over you. I don't care that you prop 8 supporters are too ignorant to see that consentual love between two sane (semi-sane) adults is never a hateful thing. I don't care that you all must be extremely insecure about your own marriages if you think that just because me and my girlfriend walk by that your wife is gonna "go gay" and leave your sorry ass. I mean, she might, cuz we are sexy as hell, but if you're that concerned then maybe you shouldn't have married. I don't care about YOU. But I will continue to voice my opinion for my rights. I do care about having the same protection and legalities binding our union. I do care about my partner being automatically viewed as the other mother of our children. I do care about all of that. And one day, when all you haters either get some sense or die, we will legally marry and live gayly ever after too. SO THERE!

So Obama won the what?

November 4th has come and gone, creating waves of oceanic hues in states that historically have had absolutely nothing to do with blue, perhaps with the exception of worshipping Elvis' Blue Suede Shoes. Yes, North Carolina and Virginia, I truly am proud of you. The best contender won, the other guy is back in Arizona and unfortunately that woman (i'm tired of her name so I opt out of typing it) is slowly (very slooowly) making the trek back to her palatial igloo. Happy days are somewhere close by enough to be here again and most of us are ecstatic about it.

But what do we do now?

I, like, many others, have been painfully addicted to this potent 'blue magic' crack rock known as the 2008 election cycle. My name is Chanel, and i'm an election junkie. I wrote about it, argued over it, cried over it, got pissed throughout it, screamed for joy at the high points, pouted like a baby at the low points, and has definitely made way for politics this year. It was like this never ending soap opera with these characters that you either hated from the pits of your soul or loved with all your heart. We all had our favorite moments, favorite catch-phrases, favorite irritating soundbites and most painful fall from grace moments. (John Edwards anyone?) And the media? HA! Talk about finding their personal cash cows. I've never watched as much CNN and MSNBC as I have over the past year and I doubt it will ever happen again. Why? Because that's all folks. Soap Opera cancelled. My favorite character won the Emmy and I can breathe easy.

So since the show's over, guess I can check myself into rehab and allow normal life to take over again....

Or, I can continue feeding this ever-growing need to be in the know of what's going on around me in the world that I live in. I can take advantage of my newfound interest in politics,maybe venturing into a community reform/service project here or there, and start making a difference somehow. Maybe I can start writing letters to my congressmen and legislature about causes that have become near and dear to my heart. (Please be prepared for a Prop 8 blog soon to come) Maybe I can brainstorm ideas to initiate some sense of unity and outreach within my community. Maybe I can revel in this idea that my little contributions really aren't all that little when considering that every major revolution had to begin with one single person...

Maybe this election cycle hasn't been so pointless afterall. I have work to do if i'm truly gonna do my part in making our society a better place to thrive in. I'm sure you do too. So let's get to it.